Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side.
To say hello from the other side.
I am a monster. Amongst all this, I'm feeling bad for the rather healthy chicken who had to die to be fed to a sick and dying dog.
Bharat Krishna Barry, Rohit Nene, Bhaskar Deol, interesting choice of team name, these people have. We have seen this name earlier, of course. I forget what the event was, though.
Let's go check this out. Who is up for a drive to this place in November, from Delhi/Gurgaon? एक बार तो देखना बनता है।
Sat in a metro headed to Gurgaon. At Qutab Minar it changed direction. I realised much later. These metro designers, I tell you. Sheer evil. No one around me got off because they all knew this would happen. They all got in the Gurgaon direction train knowing it would turn around. They wanted seats.
कुछ लोगों ने मेरी photo ली
Shweta Rao, look what your people have done to my people.
Delhite 1: What is Game of Thrones?
Delhite 2: O yaar it's a very famous sitcom.
Delhite 2: O yaar it's a very famous sitcom.
In an UberPool with Ashutosh Garg 's doppelganger. The guy even speaks like him. Wondering how to clandestinely take a photograph or video.
Nilay: What's the one thing you hate about October?
Me: I love October man. Festivals. Cultural events. Perfect weather to travel. Holidays. What's bothering you?
Nilay: The smell of mehendi. Yuck. It's everywhere.
Me: I love October man. Festivals. Cultural events. Perfect weather to travel. Holidays. What's bothering you?
Nilay: The smell of mehendi. Yuck. It's everywhere.
Zorba is in bloom. The Tattva festival is coming.
Sometimes art is way too abstract for me to make any sense of it. This is a Site Specific Performance in progress.
Sometimes art is way too abstract for me to make any sense of it. This is a Site Specific Performance in progress.
The Contemporary Art Festival is pretty good this year
Nilay: Dad, what is karwachouth?
Me: Wives fast so their husbands live longer.
Kavin: Say what!? 😯 Grown ups believe that?
Me: Wives fast so their husbands live longer.
Kavin: Say what!? 😯 Grown ups believe that?
Here is what is wrong with this world. Someone had written about the beautiful, lucid, accessible poetry of Dylan in words that I can scarcely understand. And I'm not lesser for it. The author is. It is high time we shunned complicated vocabulary and long winding sentences. Let us all share simple ideas in simple words. Or pretty poems like Dylan.
Do buy this lovely book for children by @[1005490575:2048:Ankit Chadha]. It is the perfect introduction to Amir Khusrau's mesmerising poetry.
Don't mess with us
Bird brains
Losing, not loosing. How many times must I tell people?
Alright everyone, we've got to stop making fun of the Canadians. They clearly have hearts of gold...
"All 10 of Canada’s provincial premiers support taking in the refugees and members of the opposition, including the Conservative party, attended the welcoming late Thursday. Trudeau was also joined by the ministers of immigration, health and defense, as well as Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne and Toronto Mayor John Tory."
"The headline on the front page Thursday’s Toronto Star, Canada’s largest circulation newspaper, read: “Welcome to Canada,” with the Arabic translation below: Ahlan wa sahlan. “Welcome.” "
“They step off the plane as refugees, but they walk out of this terminal as permanent residents of Canada with social insurance numbers, with health cards and with an opportunity to become full Canadians,” Trudeau said. “This is something that we are able to do in this country because we define a Canadian not by a skin color or a language or a religion or a background, but by a shared set of values, aspirations, hopes and dreams that not just Canadians but people around the world share.”
http://indianexpress.com/article/world/world-news/canadian-pm-justin-trudeau-welcomes-first-govt-plane-carrying-syrian-refugees/
"All 10 of Canada’s provincial premiers support taking in the refugees and members of the opposition, including the Conservative party, attended the welcoming late Thursday. Trudeau was also joined by the ministers of immigration, health and defense, as well as Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne and Toronto Mayor John Tory."
"The headline on the front page Thursday’s Toronto Star, Canada’s largest circulation newspaper, read: “Welcome to Canada,” with the Arabic translation below: Ahlan wa sahlan. “Welcome.” "
“They step off the plane as refugees, but they walk out of this terminal as permanent residents of Canada with social insurance numbers, with health cards and with an opportunity to become full Canadians,” Trudeau said. “This is something that we are able to do in this country because we define a Canadian not by a skin color or a language or a religion or a background, but by a shared set of values, aspirations, hopes and dreams that not just Canadians but people around the world share.”
http://indianexpress.com/article/world/world-news/canadian-pm-justin-trudeau-welcomes-first-govt-plane-carrying-syrian-refugees/
The author has so accurately captured both the dilemmas that I face as a parent bringing up children in the Delhi/NCR area. First, exposing my children to constant and life threatening pollution. Second, taking away from my children the most basic human right - freedom. The freedom to wander fearlessly in their own neighbourhood.
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/31/opinion/sunday/holding-your-breath-in-india.html
One of my boys has struggled with his adenoids since early childhood. Today, while visiting a pediatrician, I casually enquired if adenoid enlargement and pollution are linked. "Of course", said the doctor. Then, almost secretively, he told me this - every single "doctor family" he knew, was looking to move out of Delhi/NCR as soon as they could. Many had already invested in homes in safer places.
Delhi's pollution levels are so mind bogglingly high... and so persistent is the pollution... that no study comes close to predicting its consequences. My children, the child I was accompanying, and all the other children in that doctor's clinic, were suffering from either pulmonary infections, adenoid enlargement, or cough and cold. Including myself. As soon as the winter set in, everyone around me seems to be going down with a cough.
It's a game of skittles, and we all must fall down.
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/31/opinion/sunday/holding-your-breath-in-india.html
One of my boys has struggled with his adenoids since early childhood. Today, while visiting a pediatrician, I casually enquired if adenoid enlargement and pollution are linked. "Of course", said the doctor. Then, almost secretively, he told me this - every single "doctor family" he knew, was looking to move out of Delhi/NCR as soon as they could. Many had already invested in homes in safer places.
Delhi's pollution levels are so mind bogglingly high... and so persistent is the pollution... that no study comes close to predicting its consequences. My children, the child I was accompanying, and all the other children in that doctor's clinic, were suffering from either pulmonary infections, adenoid enlargement, or cough and cold. Including myself. As soon as the winter set in, everyone around me seems to be going down with a cough.
It's a game of skittles, and we all must fall down.
I don't know why everyone keeps harping about the Chennai airport being closed or reopened, when it is the Railways that is actually hauling hundreds or maybe thousands of times more passengers. Look at all their hard work.
None of the railway stations are built on an actual flood plain, like the Chennai airport. Maybe that's because the railways employs actual engineers, who can do real engineering. That one of the Chennai airport landing strips crosses over the Adyar river is an inexcusable blunder. However, railway tracks must necessarily cross over water bodies. There is actual mechanical, electrical and electronic equipment along these tracks, unlike a landing strip which is, well, mostly just a flat strip of tarmac. Even so, all railways facilities were restored well before that godforsaken airport came back to life. Equipment submerged for days was made to work before the airport guys could dry a patch of road.
Why shouldn't we just hand over the Airports Authority of India to the Indian Railways? Shortly after independence, the railways achieved almost 100% indigenisation of every technology and input that goes into their operation. On the aeronautical front, forget commercial jets, we can't even seem to make strategic fighter jets ourselves. Or radars. Or even airport terminals. Rail technology is under 200 years old. Human flight has been around for over 100 years. We have been independent for close to 70 years. So it's not like rail technology is old and solved, and aircraft technology is new fangled and complex.
I should like to know, what kind of morons run the aviation business in this country? We have sarkari spaceports that operate with a greater success rate than the developed countries, and our airports are worse than intercity bus stands. And privatisation does not help - anyone who has suffered the torture of picking up a passenger from Delhi's fancy shmancy Terminal 3 will vouch for that.
None of the railway stations are built on an actual flood plain, like the Chennai airport. Maybe that's because the railways employs actual engineers, who can do real engineering. That one of the Chennai airport landing strips crosses over the Adyar river is an inexcusable blunder. However, railway tracks must necessarily cross over water bodies. There is actual mechanical, electrical and electronic equipment along these tracks, unlike a landing strip which is, well, mostly just a flat strip of tarmac. Even so, all railways facilities were restored well before that godforsaken airport came back to life. Equipment submerged for days was made to work before the airport guys could dry a patch of road.
Why shouldn't we just hand over the Airports Authority of India to the Indian Railways? Shortly after independence, the railways achieved almost 100% indigenisation of every technology and input that goes into their operation. On the aeronautical front, forget commercial jets, we can't even seem to make strategic fighter jets ourselves. Or radars. Or even airport terminals. Rail technology is under 200 years old. Human flight has been around for over 100 years. We have been independent for close to 70 years. So it's not like rail technology is old and solved, and aircraft technology is new fangled and complex.
I should like to know, what kind of morons run the aviation business in this country? We have sarkari spaceports that operate with a greater success rate than the developed countries, and our airports are worse than intercity bus stands. And privatisation does not help - anyone who has suffered the torture of picking up a passenger from Delhi's fancy shmancy Terminal 3 will vouch for that.
If you reside in Delhi or care about good governance in India, please do watch this video. It also explains the odd-even days for cars. Delhi is definitely improving for the better.
So proud to be a Madrasi. This is for all those people who visit Chennai and say "the people are not welcoming" or "the city isn't fun". We are like this only!
Barry I have failed. My eight year old asks me who Rahman is. The same eight year old who knows Bruno Mars and Eagles lyrics by heart.
nh7, we've finally caught up with you!
Tell me this wasn't about opposing women's right to self determination. Because fighting abortion by killing grown people would be so ironic, yet so American.
Retweeted عُمر (@OmarImranTweets):
Blaming all Muslims for the terrorists is like blaming all musicians for Justin Bieber.
Blaming all Muslims for the terrorists is like blaming all musicians for Justin Bieber.
More good news: http://www.bbc.com/news/health-34744858
I hope we can follow through by first removing homeopathy from government hospitals, then stopping its "teaching", and eventually penalising the likes of Dr. Batra's for false advertising.
I hope we can follow through by first removing homeopathy from government hospitals, then stopping its "teaching", and eventually penalising the likes of Dr. Batra's for false advertising.
बधाई हो!
Indian startup scene! @[536163308:2048:Srinivas] on his way to being filthy rich, or famous, or notorious, or wherever his journey takes him :p
People, "lose" and "loose" are two completely different words. Know the difference when using them. For example, you do not "loose your phone"... you "lose your phone".
There be a zombie tonight in Gurgaon.
My mother @[100001467904279:2048:Sadhna Jain] has a painting exhibition coming up in Delhi starting tomorrow. Do attend if you're in the Delhi/NCR region. It is a group exhibition with a number of eminent artists participating.
Buzz me if you're coming and I'll make sure I'm there when you drop by. Haven't met with a number of Delhi friends in a long time. This should be a good way to catch up.
Buzz me if you're coming and I'll make sure I'm there when you drop by. Haven't met with a number of Delhi friends in a long time. This should be a good way to catch up.
The crew of Rock On 2 is shooting here at Mawlynnong. Dozens of vehicles and more than a hundred people. Crazy awesome fun. We saw Purab working up close.
Shillong, you're much, much better than we ever expected. What a welcome!
Thank you Bank of Baroda for making foreign transactions even harder for us regular, honest folk. Till 2014 the paperwork for sending any telegraphic transfer from a bank was 'only' 10 pages long. 2015 saw the addition of an income tax department online form for every remittance. 2016 will probably see a personal visit from a government sleuth, all thanks to you BoB. Good job.
Hey guys, headed to Meghalaya for a vacation. Folks who've been there, please share your thoughts on what to experience, which places to visit, and where to stay. We're currently thinking Shillong, Cherrapunji-Sohra, and Mawlynnong-Riwai-Dawki (based entirely on Rupam's fantastic photo album).
Flipkart, you are in deep shit. Your website has fallen over. You insist your customers use your app to avail sale discounts... yet your app experience is only worse. Checking out from the app using a card and 3D secure is impossible. Checking out using netbanking is horrible, but with patience and perseverance it is at least possible. Seconds after taking my money, you cancel my order. Purportedly, I am not buying these goods for end use, because I bought so many. Even when I could barely buy one each after a zillion checkout attempts.
I see what your problem is. Your production systems are in deep shit. I know you must be really hard up because last week you tried to hire me to your devops team ;). Or maybe your are here because two years ago when I interviewed with you, the interviewers didn't even know what devops meant. And your HR team insisted all engineering interviewees must be strong at algorithms irrespective of the role.
My advice to you: Please get your house in order before your advertise the hell out of it.
Also, don't hold onto someone's money for two weeks. If you have to make a refund, just do it. I cancelled an order with Grofers yesterday, and the money was back with me before my phone was back on the table.
I see what your problem is. Your production systems are in deep shit. I know you must be really hard up because last week you tried to hire me to your devops team ;). Or maybe your are here because two years ago when I interviewed with you, the interviewers didn't even know what devops meant. And your HR team insisted all engineering interviewees must be strong at algorithms irrespective of the role.
My advice to you: Please get your house in order before your advertise the hell out of it.
Also, don't hold onto someone's money for two weeks. If you have to make a refund, just do it. I cancelled an order with Grofers yesterday, and the money was back with me before my phone was back on the table.
Too Long, but Must Read.
Goli explaining the biodiversity of forest foods to the brats...
If you have kids and live in Delhi you should definitely visit, to know and taste our traditional food.
If you have kids and live in Delhi you should definitely visit, to know and taste our traditional food.
Enlightening. A must read for all.
Just received this email:
We are pleased to inform you that your resume has been shortlisted for interview at Software Development Engineer position at Amazon.
To better equip you for the interview, we’d like to help you understand our Company, our culture, our work ethics and the caliber of people we are seeking. At Amazon, everyone is a Leader - please read our Leadership Principles (http://www.amazon.jobs/principles) to learn what guides every Amazonian.
Please find below the job description:
...
And so it goes on. But I haven't even applied for a job at Amazon. I am not even looking for a job change. I don't remember posting my resume on a job site in years.
Amazon, first we hear about your terrible work culture: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/16/technology/inside-amazon-wrestling-big-ideas-in-a-bruising-workplace.html . Then you begin literally commandeering people for job interviews.
I know things are bad. After all these years, you're finally being forced to post actual profits. I'm a satisfied customer of the Amazon Fire Phone and Amazon Music, but most people think these and other new products suck. But maybe you wanna begin by treating your people well. We've been hearing horror stories about Amazon workplaces for years now...
We are pleased to inform you that your resume has been shortlisted for interview at Software Development Engineer position at Amazon.
To better equip you for the interview, we’d like to help you understand our Company, our culture, our work ethics and the caliber of people we are seeking. At Amazon, everyone is a Leader - please read our Leadership Principles (http://www.amazon.jobs/principles) to learn what guides every Amazonian.
Please find below the job description:
...
And so it goes on. But I haven't even applied for a job at Amazon. I am not even looking for a job change. I don't remember posting my resume on a job site in years.
Amazon, first we hear about your terrible work culture: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/16/technology/inside-amazon-wrestling-big-ideas-in-a-bruising-workplace.html . Then you begin literally commandeering people for job interviews.
I know things are bad. After all these years, you're finally being forced to post actual profits. I'm a satisfied customer of the Amazon Fire Phone and Amazon Music, but most people think these and other new products suck. But maybe you wanna begin by treating your people well. We've been hearing horror stories about Amazon workplaces for years now...
This explains our country perfectly. The privileged celebrate independence while the "help" wait at one side (look under the tree, they are all standing their obediently). No mingling of the rich and poor in this country, please.
Allow me to spoil your day!
Just let my bania ancestors down. I hand over my credit card to the checkout clerk. He says a minimum purchase of ₹100 is required for card payments. I point out that the magazine I'm buying costs ₹100. So he corrects the price he'd punched in to 100, then accepts my card.
The Pirates of the NaarthIndien have attacked Chennai!
Craftsmen at work
Ha ha. Looking through this was a lot of fun. Except FLAMES. I hated FLAMES and all the idiots in my class who engaged in it.
View from my bed. Not too shabby, eh?
If you're going to fall (mildly) sick on a trip, let the trip be to Alaska. With breathtaking beauty everywhere you look, you'll be contended even in bed.
By the way, the photograph was taken right now. It is 11pm and this is how it looks outside the window. Reminds me of the story I keep retelling of the 8pm girl in Boston. If you know me well and I haven't told you that story yet, hmm, then you don't know me well enough.
If you're going to fall (mildly) sick on a trip, let the trip be to Alaska. With breathtaking beauty everywhere you look, you'll be contended even in bed.
By the way, the photograph was taken right now. It is 11pm and this is how it looks outside the window. Reminds me of the story I keep retelling of the 8pm girl in Boston. If you know me well and I haven't told you that story yet, hmm, then you don't know me well enough.
On the road again...
Look what just came into our mailbox...
"sir,
it would be helpful for my final year project if you could mail me source code of your automatic ticket vending machine. kindly please mail it to me as my project mainly depends on the source code."
How am I supposed to respond to this kind of shit? "Here, take all my IP, so you don't have to do your homework. And would you like some fries with that, Sir?"
"sir,
it would be helpful for my final year project if you could mail me source code of your automatic ticket vending machine. kindly please mail it to me as my project mainly depends on the source code."
How am I supposed to respond to this kind of shit? "Here, take all my IP, so you don't have to do your homework. And would you like some fries with that, Sir?"
Awesome vacation. Terrible photos. Was too busy having fun to bother with the camera, basically.
Kiddy photo time!
This!
From the archives. How fast kids grow!
Uh oh! I'm in deep trouble. I was registering for a website and typed in the username "Jainasaurus". Android autocorrected that to Jihadists. I didn't notice and submitted my request. I'm sure this put me on all kinds of ugly lists. All this while I'm still in the US. Dang, wonder what they'll probe me with at emigration.
(Edit: Some folks misinterpreted this post to think I quit Thinvent. This post is about BloomReach. I founded Thinvent - I can never quit it :) )
So, after a long time, I ended up at this large e-commerce site (I was searching for a spare part). Instinctively, I scrolled to the bottom of the page, and frowned, "Parsing is broken again. Got to file a JIRA."
Then I remembered. It's been eighteen months now.
Ah! Sweet startup life. You never actually "quit" a startup. You just stop working there. A part of you, a part of your heart and soul, continues to live there forever.
So, after a long time, I ended up at this large e-commerce site (I was searching for a spare part). Instinctively, I scrolled to the bottom of the page, and frowned, "Parsing is broken again. Got to file a JIRA."
Then I remembered. It's been eighteen months now.
Ah! Sweet startup life. You never actually "quit" a startup. You just stop working there. A part of you, a part of your heart and soul, continues to live there forever.
What a vegetarian meal looks like in Japan. Vegetarians and vegans have a seriously bad time in Japan, as compared to other far eastern countries I've been to such as Taiwan.
I looked a lot for poverty when I was on Tokyo. And I couldn't find it. So I searched for it online. You know how it is, when you look for something in real life and you can't find it, you try to find it online. Anyway, the Internet said there is poverty in Japan. And finally, on the penultimate day, I found homeless people. In the strangest place too - right under the Tokyo Metropolitan Building. Which says a lot about my lack of intelligence, because that's where they should be. Right under that double phallic symbol of government ostentatiousness, that's where they all were with their carts and bags all wrapped up in tarp. What a great sense of irony the Japanese poor have. So anyway, I was glad to see them. And before you take me for some sick sadist, think about my earlier posts. The Japanese have elegantly solved so many problems that plague India. So I'm always looking for solutions and ideas to copy. But it looks like even the great Japanese do not have a solution for poverty. Which makes me feel a little better about the grave injustice we're meting out to the poor in India, because hey, it's a hard problem. Makes me a little happier. Well anyway, I know what you're going to say at this point. That there isn't any poverty in Scandinavia. But I haven't been to any of the Scandinavian countries. I barely got done with Japan here, ok. So give the guy a break.
If at this point you can't tell that I just got done watching a Woody Allen movie, then you are, well, then you don't know me well enough.
See the big problem with the Internet is that sometimes it's not there. And the questions are there. And by the time you get to the Internet those questions aren't with you any more. You know what I'm saying. Like every time I'm on an airplane, I see these exit doors. And on them, in big red letters, they've explained how to open them. Now I don't know if you've seen any of those movies where the protagonist opens the door of a flying aircraft and it begins to depressurise. But I have. So every time I look at those doors, I wonder if someone could open them mid-flight. Not a terrorist; I'm not afraid of terrorists. I'm afraid of stupid people and temporary insanity. It could be me. It could be you. It could be anybody. Don't you have that moment sometimes when you're standing on the balcony and you're thinking, 'what if I had some crazy fit and I jumped off'. And the next moment you're thinking, 'hey, why would I jump off. I have a happy life. I wanna live'. And the whole thing leaves you scared. Not scared of heights like me. Scared of your own mind. Well anyway, I don't wanna go up to an air hostess and ask her creepy questions like this. It's not polite. Also they might flag me for being a loony and handcuff me when I disembark from the airplane. You know, some cops standing their with handcuffs trying to be polite and tough at the same time.
So this a note to self to read about this whole airplane emergency exit business once and for all and get my mind at rest. If there can be such a thing as a restful mind. And I don't understand why you're reading my private notes to myself. It's kind of creepy, you know. You should see a therapist. It'd be good for you.
If at this point you can't tell that I just got done watching a Woody Allen movie, then you are, well, then you don't know me well enough.
See the big problem with the Internet is that sometimes it's not there. And the questions are there. And by the time you get to the Internet those questions aren't with you any more. You know what I'm saying. Like every time I'm on an airplane, I see these exit doors. And on them, in big red letters, they've explained how to open them. Now I don't know if you've seen any of those movies where the protagonist opens the door of a flying aircraft and it begins to depressurise. But I have. So every time I look at those doors, I wonder if someone could open them mid-flight. Not a terrorist; I'm not afraid of terrorists. I'm afraid of stupid people and temporary insanity. It could be me. It could be you. It could be anybody. Don't you have that moment sometimes when you're standing on the balcony and you're thinking, 'what if I had some crazy fit and I jumped off'. And the next moment you're thinking, 'hey, why would I jump off. I have a happy life. I wanna live'. And the whole thing leaves you scared. Not scared of heights like me. Scared of your own mind. Well anyway, I don't wanna go up to an air hostess and ask her creepy questions like this. It's not polite. Also they might flag me for being a loony and handcuff me when I disembark from the airplane. You know, some cops standing their with handcuffs trying to be polite and tough at the same time.
So this a note to self to read about this whole airplane emergency exit business once and for all and get my mind at rest. If there can be such a thing as a restful mind. And I don't understand why you're reading my private notes to myself. It's kind of creepy, you know. You should see a therapist. It'd be good for you.
Don't do it don't do it don't do it. Remember you're petrified of heights!